Sunday, 15 September 2013

Cthulhu doesn't review Doctor Who: Love & Monsters

No one would have believed, in the final days of last week, that cat reviews were being read in the sunken city of black R'lyeh.
No one could have dreamed we were being scrutinised, as someone with a microscope studies creatures that swarm and multiply in a drop of water. Few cats even considered the possibility of Great Old Ones reviewing Doctor Who.
And yet, across the gulf between sofas, faces immeasurably more betentacled than ours regarded this blog with envious eyes, and slowly and surely, they drew their plans against us.

Hello everyone it is me, Mighty Cthulhu here again. Love & Monsters is a single-part story from series 2 of Doctor Who. It was written by Russell T Davies and starred Peter Kay as the Abzorbaloff, and is the best episode of Doctor Who evar.

By the way, don't listen to Dagon when he says that Warriors of the Deep is the best Doctor Who story, he knows nothing! He doesn't even consider the New Series to be canon for a start! But he will pay, oh yes, he will pay. One day, he will be forced to acknowledge that Rose is the Doctor's one true love! All shall bow before me or suffer the fate of the people of Sarnath, forced forever to watch Dimensions in Time without 3-D glasses! One day my black R'lyeh will rise, I will become master of the Earth, and all of my fanfiction will be made into proper episodes with David Tennant and Billie Piper in them and everything...

Where was I? Ah yes, please now lose D100 points of Sanity while I put the DVD on to remind myself of how great Love & Monsters is...

Editor's note: By mutual consent it has been agreed that Cthulhu may finish his review when the stars are right.

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