Thursday, 1 April 2010

Big Gay Longcat reviews Blakes 7: Warlord

Avon has new friends and Tarrant has a pink-haired girlfriend. It's up to her equally pink-haired daddy to get in their way.

Warlord, by Simon Masters, is the second-last episode of Blakes 7. It is the beginning of the end, as the events of this story lead into the ultimate events of Blake.

It starts with Avon talking to some mannys about the Federation and showing them films of other mannys going up and down escalators. The mannys argue with Avon and talk about Zukan who is a pirate or a president or both.

Zukan has pink hair when he arrives. Zeona is Zukan's daughter. She has two pink wigs for her hair and is fabulous.

Zeona and Zukan.

Zukan doesn't know Zeona is at the base. Avon and Zukan and the other mannys make friends, but then there is a secret baddy in the base doing secret bad things. It is Zukan! Zukan is really a baddy but Avon doesn't know this.

Zukan finds out Zeona is there. She is having kiffs with Tarrant. Avon sounds very angry when he talks to Tarrant. I think Avon is so angry because he is jealous, and he carries Tarrant out of the room with Zeona and Zukan in it. This is a very funny bit and made me lol.

Zeona, Soolin and Avon (but not Tarrant) go off in Scorpio! Soolin teleports Zeona back to Tarrant without Avon knowing about it, but Avon quickly guesses what has happened because he is clever. Zeona kiffs Tarrant again.

Tarrant gets lots of kiffs this episode.

Zukan takes off in his spaceship with his friend Finn who knows about his secret. They left behind bombs that go off in the base, blowing up the teleport and all the ways out. Tarrant and Vila try to get out but there is something in the air that kills the other mannys (except for Tarrant, Vila, Dayna and Zeona).

Zukan and Finn meet up with their real friend, who is Servalan! Here is an exchange between Zukan and Servalan that makes me think Zukan may have liked Avon really:
Zukan: "Against one man?"
Servalan: "Against Avon."
Zukan: "You make me wonder if I didn't choose badly. You fear him. He and I, together we could have been invincible."

Avon and Soolin walk into a Federation trap on Zukan's planet. Soolin pretends to be Zeona so they trick the Federation mannys and escape. Soolin is very smart here and this is an action-packed bit with lots of pewpewpew.

Zukan feels bad about being a baddy but Finn doesn't. They find the bomb that Servalan left behind to blow them up. Zukan ejects Finn and the bomb into space to save himself, but it still explodes and his spaceship goes out of control and blows up. That is the end of Zukan.

Everyone at the base is going to run out of air but Avon works out how to save them and then teleports them up to Scorpio! He doesn't need Zukan's help because Avon is clever and Zukan is an untrustworthy baddy. So Avon doesn't try to save Zukan and lets him blow up.

Zeona realises her daddy was the baddy. She kiffs Tarrant and then teleports down to fix the machine that killed the mannys. But after she does this she dies because she was sad her daddy was a baddy. This makes Tarrant very sad.

Poor Tarrant.

This is a very good episode. It is dramatic because the stakes are high - Avon wants to have new friends and fight the Federation, and Tarrant has a girlfriend but her daddy is secretly the baddy - and things go very wrong for our heroes before Avon saves them. But Zeona dying is a tragic ending, almost like the end of a Shakespeare play, and it is not a happy ending. And there is more tragedy and drama still to come in the next episode.

But that's another story...

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