Big Gay Longcat reviews Doctor Who: The Ambassadors OF DEATH Episode Six

"It's closing in too fast, I can't..."

The Doctor is cut off mid-sentence as the alien spaceship captures him.

"You are not in danger."

says the aliens, somewhat undermining the carefully built-up sense of tension, but maintaining the mystery at least.

"Where am I?"

is the Doctor's first question, because he's a fan of The Prisoner too. The Doctor gets some exposition from them:

"You are on board our spacecraft. Open your hatch and leave the capsule."
"What's happened to our three astronauts?"
"They are unharmed. Open your hatch and leave the capsule."

I think these aliens would get on well with Professor Cornish, since they also like repeating themselves.

"You will not need your life support systems. An environment has been prepared for you."

CSO! Has the Doctor arrived in Barry Letts's Heaven?

The Doctor goes into a room where the missing astronauts are sitting watching space television, where there isn't really anything on but they think there is (a bit like us cats when Blakes 7 isn't on). This saves the BBC some moneys from not having to pay for the rights to show the clips of whatever it is they think they're watching.

The mannys have all been hypno-eyesed by the TV (I know that feeling) into thinking they are safe on Earth. We see a glimpse of the aliens when one of them talks to the Doctor through their space window.

"Why have you taken them prisoner?"
"Why have you not returned our ambassadors?"
"Ambassadors?"
"An agreement was made. You have betrayed us. Unless our ambassadors are returned, we shall destroy your world."
"Ambassadors!"

Back on Earth, Carrington wants to attack the alien spaceship with "missiles with atomic warheads." No surprises there, he is such a dick. When he leaves, Professor Cornish says

"The man's mad."

The Brigadier says

"Not necessarily. We don't know what that thing is there."
"Then surely we should find out?"
"Perhaps someone's found out already?"
"What do you mean?"
"I have a feeling that General Carrington knows a great deal more than he's telling us. He went on a Mars Probe himself, remember. Perhaps he discovered something?"
"Then why doesn't he tell us?"
"I don't know."
"Are you supporting his plan to attack blindly?"
"No. I think we should wait."

This exchange shows interesting layers to the Brigadier's character that will soon be lost in future stories. Also that Professor Cornish is a good foil for the Brigadier.

In space the Doctor has had some more discussions with the aliens in between scenes, so we don't know everything he has found out from them. He promises to get their ambassadors back, so they will let the Doctor go, but will keep the astronauts until their ambassadors are returned.

The Brigadier finds out that Lennox has been killed off screen since we last saw him. Professor Cornish points out all the things that have been going wrong:

"The astronauts are still missing, Miss Shaw kidnapped, Dr Taltalian killed, and now this man Lennox murdered under your very nose."

but the Brigadier says some things that he does know about the baddys, proving that UNIT isn't completely useless without the Doctor:

"We've identified the two radioactive bodies that were found in that gravel pit in Hertfordshire. They weren't foreign agents at all, they were petty London criminals. And the explosive that killed Dr Taltalian was the new H37 compound which hasn't even been issued to the army yet."
"Then our own people could be involved?"
"That was the Doctor's theory. Also forensics have analysed the mud that was found on the shoes Lennox was wearing."
"And what does that tell you?"
"Well, it could tell us where he'd been recently. You see, there were elements of insecticide in that mud. We're now checking all the areas where that insecticide is used."
"This isotope that killed Lennox, have you checked on that?"
"It was part of a consignment sold some months ago."
"Who was the buyer?"
"A bogus company with an address that doesn't even exist."
"You've been very thorough."

Professor Cornish seems apologetic for having doubted the Brigadier and UNIT, but even with all that the Brigadier concludes

"It doesn't seem to have got me anywhere."

The Doctor makes contact with them and tells them he is coming back, but doesn't tell them much else in case the baddys can overhear them - which seems likely given how well-organised they have been.

Liz is giving the alien ambassadors their radiation noms (and I thought that ambassadors only ate Ferrero Rocher, mew) when they start making loud noises and one of them takes its helmet off to show its scary blue face.

Regan comes in and tells Liz he is planning to betray his secret boss and use the aliens to do what he wants, not what the boss wants. He offers Liz a job - oh noes, Liz might have to do the W-word, no wonder she is reluctant. She asks

"What's the alternative?"
"I kill you and buy myself another scientist."

The boss telephones Regan and tells him to have another go at killing the Doctor after he comes back from space. So Regan goes to the Space Centre (again) and knocks out the newly-landed Doctor with gas - again knowing exactly where to go and what to do - he then goes in and kittennaps the Doctor, escaping in his van just in time before the Brigadier finds out the Doctor is gone and raises the alarm.

Carrington tries to put the blame on the Doctor:

"Did it occur to you that all these troubles only started when this Doctor came on the scene?"
"With respect, sir, that is simply not true."

responds the Brigadier, who has clearly had enough of Carrington's bullshit by this point. If only more stories had moments like that, where characters trust and defend somebody who has been on their side time and time again instead of acting stupid just to serve the momentary needs of the plot, as so often happens.
Professor Cornish asks Carrington what he thinks they should do about the alien spaceship, receiving the reply

"Arm every available missile with atomic warheads and blast that thing out of our skies!"
"Isn't that a bit extreme?"

A bit?

"It's our moral duty."

Carrington then leaves, so the Brigadier can now say what he really thinks about him:

"I think the general's a bit overwrought."

He's too polite. Professor Cornish says what we're all really thinking:

"I think he's insane."

Regan, who is now in costume as the King of Space (dress for the job you want), tells his boss the Doctor is ded, but he is actually just captured. Regan wants the Doctor to make him a "translation machine" so he can talk to the aliens.

Regan leaves the Doctor and Liz locked in his base, then Carrington comes in with a gun and reveals himself as Regan's secret boss the whole time, to the surprise of nobody. He intends to shoot the Doctor, again saying it is his "moral duty." Cliffhanger!